Cry
by Amplify. Your. Imagination
Summary: First songfic. Harry lost the one person he loved the most. Oneshot


**Hi guys! So, I don't know if this will make a difference in where my story appears when you filter what you are trying to read, but I'm editing my stuff. Actually, I did it a long time ago and am just getting around the replacing the chapters here... Oops, my bad. X) Anywho, same story, just edited. Thanks for reading! :D**

**I own nothing. It all belongs to J.K. Rowling and publishing and the song is Kelly Clarkson's Cry. :)**

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They stare at me with pity in their eyes. They know how much I loved you. Still love you. How hard it is for me to see you two together. But they'll never really know what it's like. To see the one person they can't live without move on to someone new. For that someone new to be their best friend. They talk about it a lot. How hard I took it. How happy you look. Maybe it was a good thing he moved on, they say. Maybe I did something wrong. I try to stop listening, but it gets through anyway.

_If anyone asks  
I'll tell them we both just moved on  
When people all stare  
I'll pretend that I don't hear them talk_

I watch you, you know. I watch you with him, wishing it were me you were holding. Wishing it was me you would smile for, laugh for. You used to. Do you remember that? Your arms were warm and strong. I would have been happy forever if you would have just held me that way for the rest of my life. But I don't say that. I just smile at you and say it's okay. I just want you happy.

_Whenever I see you  
I'll swallow my pride and bite my tongue  
Pretend I'm okay with it all  
Act like there's nothing wrong_

Acting like I'm okay with this is painful. I want to run over to you and beg you to take me back, to say you still love me. But then I wouldn't really love you would I? Your happiness should always come first, shouldn't it? But when do I get my happiness? Will this ever end? The pain I feel every day knowing I have to live without you? Every morning I wake up, I don't want to open my eyes. Because when I do, I have to face another day, watching you with him. Do you have any idea how hard it is? Does it get harder? I hope not. Already, I cry myself to sleep at night, hugging my pillow; wishing it was you.

_Is it over yet?  
Can I open my eyes?  
Is this as hard as it gets?  
Is this what it feels like to really cry? Cry?_

We just drifted apart, I finally say. We wanted different things. They except the answer, but who knows if they really believe me. I can't honestly say I care. I have said all I'll say, they just have to get over it. Just like I do.

_If anyone asks  
I'll tell them we just grew apart  
Yeah, what do I care?  
If they believe me or not (if they believe me or not)_

I spend most of my time alone thinking about the days we would spend just talking. You would whisper into my ear how happy I made you, and I would tell you I loved you. You know, until now, I'd never realized that you hadn't said you loved me too. Not once. My heart breaks a little more each time I think about it. I really should stop spending time alone.

_Whenever I feel  
Your memory is breakin' my heart  
I'll pretend I'm okay with it all  
Act like there's nothing wrong_

Will it ever be over? This pain? Is it possible to die from a broken heart? I don't think so, but why does it feel that way? I just want to close my eyes and will it all away. But when I open them, the pain is there. I feel like it's killing me, slowly but surely. Dying with tears streaming down my face; I've never heard of that happening before.

_Is it over yet?  
Can I open my eyes?  
Is this as hard as it gets?  
Is this what it feels like to really cry? Cry?_

Every time I tell them I'm fine, I'm lying. They know it. I say it enough, sometimes I feel like all I can do is talk in circles, never straying form saying I'm fine, I'm fine, I'm fine... Why won't this just stop for a while? Let me get some sleep for once? I haven't had much since you left.

_I'm talkin' in circles  
I'm lyin', they know it  
Why won't this just stop for a while?_

Have I really cried over you? I couldn't say. I cry too much to know. My eyes swell shut, puffy and red. I can still hear your voice, as well as if you were standing there saying to me how horrible I look and it makes me smile. The only thing that makes me smile anymore; ironic, I know. And if it's a bit bitter, who can blame me?

_Is it over yet?  
Can I open my eyes?  
Is this as hard as it gets?  
Is this what it feels like to really cry?  
Cry? Cry?_

Goodbye, my love. Goodbye, my Dragon. I'll love you always.


End file.
